Wednesday, May 20, 2009

How to Weds: How to be friends with a Cynic!

***I would like to apologize for the recent decrease in new blogs and postings. It's been an incredibly hectic October, and from the looks of it, November won't be much better. Alas, that is life, and with that said......... off to the blog!***

The most crucial part would be identifying if this blog even applies to you, and your possibly-cynic friend. To do so, you must first understand the meaning of the word "cynic".

Mirriam-Webster defines as follows:

Main Entry:
Middle French or Latin, Middle French cynique, from Latin cynicus, from Greek kynikos, literally, like a dog, from kyn-, kyōn dog — more at hound
1capitalized : an adherent of an ancient Greek school of philosophers who held the view that virtue is the only good and that its essence lies in self-control and independence
2: a faultfinding captious critic ; especially : one who believes that human conduct is motivated wholly by self-interest
— cynic adjective

So now that we have identified the meaning of this, lets dissect it further.

1) Keep an OPEN mind and do your due dilligence to find out...Why is your friend a cynic? They might have been burned in the past by being too trusting, or they might have issues from their childhood. Asking about past relationships is not necessarily a bad thing or too nosy. It has been my experience, they are usually willing to share.

2) Value their opinion. Just because they are cynical by no means does this make them wrong. Investigate the possibility that their concerns are valid and they not just trying to rain on your parade.

3) Discard their opinion if you decide their concerns are in fact not valid. PAUSE, this is important because they might simply be trying to rain on your parade, and if you believe that's the case, it's better to ignore the cynic's outlook and develop a more positive one yourself.

4) Ask them to Shut-Their-Face if their rants are getting too distracting. If they truly respect you, a friend will always give you space. If they care about you, they will give you support. If the cynic absolutely can not be a friend to you, consider taking a break from working so hard to be their friend. - This will be the true test of your friendship.

5) Take time away from your cynical friend. They drain your positive energy, and you need to replenish that before you see them again and go back to that stressful situation.

If none of the steps above apply, or helped you in any way it might be due toone of two possibilies:
One - You're a cynical douche, and this blog is about YOU... or ...
Two - I'm an ineffective cynical blogging douche.

Either way, blog on!

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